10 snippets of my crazy international school

So, working at an international school brings its challenges, but also it's rewarding moments of astonished humor. Here are some moments which bring that euphoria... 1) So, during the 2nd week of school, while walking into my classroom, a darling student stops, looks at me and asks, "Are you sick?" My smile quickly faded as I replied, "No, do I look sick?" His simple reply drained all happiness from my day, "Yes." Well thank you for being so honest. 2) One day when I actually was sick, an 8th grader just had to ask, "Do you have a cold?" "Yes, sorry I sound so nasty," I admitted. "Yah, ya do." Wow. Someone really taught them honesty. 3) Probably my most favorite question of all time is, "Are we going to do anything fun today?" Whenever I hear those words float from the innocent mouths of my pupils, my heart just leaps for joy. My favorite response, "No." 4) So, here's a joy of an international Christian school...one printer. That's right, every morning is a life and death fight over the printer rights. Teacher against teacher with an occasional office staff thrown in there, battling it out for that most imperitive document to force it's way through enemy lines. Of course when that happens, the battle turns into a war in the copier room...but that's another story. 5) Here's another joyous event that is sure to bring a smile to many faces...power outages. The power has a mind of it's own, and for some reason that mind gets sleepy right after lunch. I've long said that siesta should be implemented around the world, and the power in my building agrees. My 6th grade class witnesses power breaks, on average, twice a class period. Tops being about six in one 50 minute class. We're so used to it now, I keep on talking and no one blinks an eye. 6) I have one student, who I think has studied history more than I have...and I have a minor in it. One day he raises his hand, I walk over, and he asked which empire was bigger, the Mongol or the Persian. "I don't know 'John'." "Well it was the Mongol." He then continued on to show me maps from our textbook proving his point. -well ok then, thank you. 7) Another day, this same kid storms into the classroom "debating" with another student. They waltz straight over to me and asked, "How did Attila the Hun die?" (My usually response by now...) "I don't know 'John'." "Well it was a nose bleed!" he vehemently declares. At which the other student involved in this historical debate chimes in with "It was not a nose bleed! Can you die from a nose bleed, Miss Jones?" I then joined the debate, along with a couple other students, and discussed the possibility of dying from a nose bleed. And of course, whether Attila the Hun actually did or not. Who knew 7th graders would willingly have discussions about how Attila the Hun died, outside of class?! 8) My mom sent over lots of yummy candy, of which included one of my favorites, jelly beans. I've been eating them for a couple weeks now, savoring each one individually. My students often see them out on my desk, and I daily receive at least 5 requests for a jelly bean. Unfortunately for them, I am not a very caring teacher when it comes to my American jelly beans, and my constant reply is simply, "no." Sometimes it is sad to see their dismayed faces, so once I actually gave every student in one of my classes one jelly bean each. You'd thought I'd given them a chocolate cake. (I ate the last jelly bean today.) 9) One of my Kenyan 6th graders has, for some reason, taken it upon himself to teach me Swahili. Every Friday during our game day during study hall, he pulls me aside and says, "Miss Jones, you know it's time for your Swahili lesson." So far he has taught me the proper Kenyan greeting, and attempted to teach me to ask how much something costs. He has also given me multiple lessons on the importance of learning Swahili so that when I get in a matatu I will not be taken advantage of because I am white. He is quite afraid I will be taken to a dark place and have bad things done to me, or quite worse, be charged too much. His newest strategy for my avoiding this is teaching me to speak English with a Kenyan accent. 10) One saying that typically fits any situation I may find myself in, and which is frequently quoted is, "TIA," "This Is Africa."